Sad Songs Are Nature's Onions

"For the sickness, that be spreadin with the quickness Remedies, cousin I be doin on my enemies Penalty, then I drink forties to they memories" - "Release Yo' Delf" by Method Man

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Old Ladies + Big Crowds = Bad Words, Or "How Iain Lost The Christmas Spirit"

Yesterday was mine and Kathryn's 6-month anniversary, so we got our asses out of the house to celebrate. Kathryn treated me to brunch at Saege, a new bistro here in Halifax. I had the Huevos Rancheros, which involved a couple of fried eggs, some tostadas (crispy fried corn tortillas), some fresh salsa, cilantro, and some bacon. Good stuff. We then spent a few hours getting a jump start on some Christmas shopping. After that, we went to the theatre to see Walk The Line, the new Johnny Cash biopic. I thought that the movie was fantastic, and both Joaquin Phoenix (he played Johnny) and Reese Witherspoon (she played June Carter) did an excellent job with the singing and whatnot. The drunk guy in front of us did not share this opinion, unfortunately. Dude spends the entire movie making "funny" cracks about the movie, then wobbles out of the theatre yelling "Nobody go see that Johnny Cash movie, it sucks!" at anybody within earshot. A walking, breathing anti-drinking ad, I tells ya. After the movie was out, I was excited, because it was time for the annual Christmas parade. Well, I was excited, until we actually got out to the street. What we were greeted with was a throng of cranky ass people moving at the speed of snot. Kathryn and I positioned ourselves down by the road, behind a young mother, her baby, and the grandmother. They seemed nice enough at first, but that lasted about 2 minutes. Some theatre goers were trying to get home, and politely asked the people in front of us to step aside for a moment. Unbeknownst to the poor couple, they had crossed a line in asking what seemed to be such an innocuous question. After a few terse refusals, the trapped couple started to become a little agited with Mommy and Grandma. I'm not exactly sure what happened next, but I all I know is that the discussion ended with Grandma calling this girl, and I quote, "A slut." This is about the time where Kathryn and I made a mutual decision to skip the parade and get to dinner. Parades suck anyways, right? Anybody can put some lights on a minivan and wave at kids. We made our way through the mob and finally got to Opa Taverna for dinner. Some kalamata spread with pita, some lamb ravioli in tomato sauce, some wine, and the bitter memory of "The Christmas Parade From Hell" was washed away from our memories. The topper of the evening was a viewing of the fifth edition of TV Carnage. A great day, no doubt. And god bless us, everyone.


  • At 6:27 p.m., Anonymous Giselle said…

    Happy anniversary! I agree. Anyone can put lights on a minivan and wave at kids. Parades fit into the "fun in theory -- not in practice" category, like most activities that involve crowds. I applaud Grandma.


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