Sad Songs Are Nature's Onions

"For the sickness, that be spreadin with the quickness Remedies, cousin I be doin on my enemies Penalty, then I drink forties to they memories" - "Release Yo' Delf" by Method Man

Thursday, September 30, 2004

Hmm, let's see now, I'm pretty sure Bill already has a zeppelin...

Feel like getting an early start on your Non-Denominational Seasonal Gift Giving Holiday (a.k.a. "Christmas")? Filthy fucking rich? If so, then you may want to check out the new Nieman Marcus Christmas catalogue. It's filled with all sorts of wonderful and affordable gift ideas. Here are some samples:

- A limited-edition 2005 Maserati Quattroporte - Comes in at a cool $125,000. A light breeze through your wallet.

- His And Hers Bowling Alley - Like to bowl, but hate to leave your estate and mix with the common rabble? Well, why not build your own alley? Starting at $1,450,000.

- Underwater Aviator - It's a fucking submarine! A SUBMARINE! Jacques Cousteau would have given his left and right nut to get his hands on one of these bad boys, and it's only gonna cost you $1,700,000 (believe me, for a submarine, that's a steal).

- Zeppelin - Ah, what kind of a filthy rich lunatic is complete without his or her own zeppelin? Look dude, the Jones' across the street just bought their own zeppelin. You're better than the Jones', right? That's what I thought. Now, pull out that chequebook, cut a cheque for $10,000,000, and let's getting flying! "Hey there, rich asshole, flying through the sky so fancy free..."


  • At 9:13 a.m., Blogger Ivy Dillinger said…

    Finally! Someone agrees with me about zeppelins!

  • At 10:03 a.m., Blogger iaingillis said…

    I would like to buy a zeppelin myself, but most of my money is currently tied up in the restoration of my vintage steamship, circa 1912. Biggie was right: mo' money, mo' problems...

  • At 3:22 a.m., Anonymous Anonymous said…

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